Conclusions from Wheat Month: only butter tarts are worth it

Wheat Month is done, thank goodness. For those of you who didn't read this post, I ate wheat every meal for the month of July in order to have a proper celiac test. I'm still waiting on the results of the test, but after eating gluten more frequently than I ever have before, I know for sure that I will be living a wheat free life from now on. Here's some things I noticed during wheat month that have contributed to this conclusion.

It seems to have made me allergic to working out. During wheat month, whenever I worked out I would get these tiny blisters all over my stomach. They were itchy and would go away a few hours later. There could be a confounding variable (heat rash?) but it never happened before, and hasn't happened since dispite lots of hot days. Who wants to eat something that gives them a rash?

Wheat makes me squishy. I didn't look much different to others (I gained <10 lbs), but I felt softer and less lean. And apparently my wheat weight all went to my thighs because my shorts got a bit tight (and my backsquat didn't go up eough to account for that!). To be fair, the wheat is not entirely to blame. I also ate a lot more sugar during wheat month becuase I was allowing myself to have every delicious thing that I could think of in case I never ate it again. I probably got half of my wheat from dessert, and I'd do it again.

Wheat destroys my will power. I don't know what it is about wheat. It's not addictive to me in the sense that I don't have sudden uncontrolable cravings. But, I did find that once I started I couldn't stop, if it was in front of me I'd eat it (the pre-dinner bread basket syndrome). I often have fairly good self control, but I would find myself eating another slice of bread or another cookie, even if I was full and didn't really want it. This resulted in guilt. When I did my first paleo challenge I finally stopped associating guilt with food after years of considering it to be the enemy. With paleo, I never felt bad about what I was eating. I'd eat as much as I wanted, and I'd stop when I was no longer hungry. The lack of guilt, and the feeling of control, are totally worth giving up wheat.

Wheat makes me slower. I'm a terrible runner to begin with, but when I was on wheat I was extra wheezy, requiring breaks even on a 400 m run. It was like my first week at CrossFit all over again.

Wheat makes me lazy. I had become used to making my own paleo bread, snacks, and treats, and enjoyed knowing exactly what I was consuming. During wheat month I was much more inclined to buy processed food than to make it for myself.

Wheat products don't taste as good anymore. Overall, I think I needed that horrible binge, where I was forcing myself to eat what products even when I didn't feel like eating them. I've long since believed that you don't need wheat in your life and that you can do quite well without it, but this convinced me that I don't really want it anymore. If you've gone wheat free and have been so for a few months, but still find yourself badly craving some of your favourites (dreaming about pizza?), I suggest you actually give them a try again. You might find that they'er not half as tasty as you remember, and that you actually prefer the more flavourful paleo alternative (and that they make you feel like poo). I ate A LOT of those former favourites during wheat month, none of them were worth it.

Except butter tarts. I will cheat once annually on butter tarts.

Sweet Potato Chili Fries

I stole this recipe from PaleOMG, although I suppose since I'm telling you this it's sharing, not stealing? Anyway, I made these tonight and they are delicious. What they lack in the crispiness of real fries they make up for in flavour.

EDIT: did you know there are sweet potatos that aren't bright orange?? I got some various brands of sweet potato from the farmers market this week, and some were purple, while some were red on the outside and white inside! These non orange sorts seemed to crisp much better (sometimes the orange ones are a bit soggy).

They don't even have any gluten in them which, since it's Wheat Month, is actually a problem right now. Which brings me to the real reason Wheat Month is going to make me fat, aside from the wheat. It's because my thought process, when I'm allowed to run about consuming wheat products at my leisure, goes like this: "Hm....what shall I have for dinner? I know, paleOMG's chili fries. Oh shoot, there's no gluten in those...." at which point I wandered around the grocery store looking for a gluten product worth consuming and left with a box of President's Choice Decadent Peanut Butter Icecream Sandwiches. I won't tell you how delicious they were because that would be mean.

NOTE: Nick points out I did not have to buy junk food to get my gluten, I could have thickened my chili with flour like a normal person. Touche. I'll remember that.....once the cookies are gone....

paleOMG's Sweet Potato Chili Fries

I did mine slightly differently than Juli (i.e., I did less work because I'm lazy). Also she somehow has sweet potatoes that aren't bright orange....dunno where to get those.

Ingredients

• One large sweet potato. Pick one that's stout and round not long and warped for optimum fry size
• Ground beef or sausage
• 2-3 tomatoes, diced
• seasonings to taste (salt, pepper, paprika, chili powder, garlic/onion powder, a dash of cayenne pepper)
• half a sliced avacado

1.  Start browning your ground beef or sausage
2. Slice your potato into fries (cut in half and quarters lengthwise, etc, until you have somewhat even fry sized strips.
3. Dust the fries lightly with olive oil. If you put too much they won't crisp.
4. Salt the fries and bake on ~400 until squishy (cooked) and then broil for a few minutes (to crisp) until your smoke detector tells you they're done.
5. Meanwhile, add diced tomatoes to the meat and season. Simmer until the tomatoes are all juiced and the chili starts to thicken again.
6. Make a nest with your fries and plop the chili in the middle. Serve with a sliced avocado to cut the heat of the cayenne and get some tasty fats.

Wheat Month

So, as I have mentioned to some of you, I'm gonna eat wheat for a month.

I'm doing this because my blood test for celiac's, which I took before I had given up wheat entirely, was inconclusive. The blood test looks for two antibodies which are present if you're celiac (and if you've been eating gluten). I was negative for the one that almost always comes with celiac disease, but positive for the one that usually but not always means you have celiac disease. As a result, the only way to know for sure is to have an endoscopy done, which looks for damage in the gut. Therefore, in order for the test to work correctly, I must damage my gut. Fun! No one knows exactly how much damage is required to avoid having a false negative test result (and if I'm going to go through this I'd rather be on the safe side!), but my doctor recommended that, since I've been almost completely gluten free, I should eat gluten for a month. At every meal.


People who follow the paleo lifestyle have asked me why I'm bothering with the test if I intend to be wheat free for life anyway. To be clear, I do intend to be wheat-free for life, regardless of the test results. I like myself better, physically, emotionally, mentally, when I'm not eating wheat. The strictness with which I adhere to this standard, however, will depend on these test results. I will always be wheat free in my home. I haven't purchased a glutenous product since before Christmas when I began the challenge (until today). There are two reasons I'm testing. The first is because if I have celiacs, I can't "cheat", and the second reason is related: convenience when eating out. If I have celiac's, I need to be more diligent in asking the server about every sauce, every burger (does it have filler?), every marinade (soya sauce?) or any number of other common menue items where wheat hides (like batter on sweet potato fries, be careful of this one!). If I don't have it, I will continue to order my burger without a bun and hope that there's no breadcrumbs lurking inside the patty. And I will continue to have a few of my mom's awesome tarts at christmas.

The effect that wheat has on me is not as instant, direct, or debilitating as it is for some. I don't get nauseous, start itching, get bloated, or have to run to the washroom immediately. My "symptoms" are more subtle. I feel less lean ("squishier"), slower, a little more tired, weaker, generally icky and all around less badass.

I also potentially do not absorb iron when eating wheat. I tested at the lowest possible healthy level before the challenge. After not eating wheat for 10 weeks (and not changing my intake of meat or leafy greens), my iron count went from 16 to 55, well within the healthy range. Iron=energy and alertness, which I like. I also was B12 deficient, although I took supplements for that right away (B12 is important for mental function!) so it's unclear whether it would have gone up on its own. My research suggests that deficiencies in these things can both be a symptom of celiacs, assuming you're getting enough in your diet, and my doctor agreed.

Anyway, I'm eating wheat for a month, for better or worse.  I went to the grocery store this week because I realized if I was going to eat wheat in every meal I should probably have some on hand. I ventured into the inner aisles and, honestly, I couldn't find a single thing that I actually wanted to buy. I craved none of it. I finally settled on some of those rainforest crisps (gourmet crackers) for snacks, and a box of granola to add to my paleo cereal or greek yogurt for my breakfast gluten serving.

I decided that if I'm going to eat wheat, it had better be the good shit. I'm not going to just load up on lame crackers and wonderbread. So I made up a wish list, which probably includes far too many pastries, of all the things I want to have during this month, just in case I can never have them again. Grilled cheese from the Bean Bar, butter tarts, bagels from Locke St, shortbread, mom's biscuits, Nick's mom's arugula pizza, oreos.....yup, I'm gonna get temporarily fat. Which will not only be unattractive, but annoying, because I just had to buy a whole bunch of new shorts for the summer because last year's pairs all just fall completely off...

I suspect that by the end of wheat month I'm going to be very glad to be returning to paleo...the thought of having to eat wheat at EVERY meal is a bit daunting and kind of grosses me out. I've just begun eating wheat again and already I've noticed some undesirable qualities. I bought some fresh egg bread from the Dundas Market today becuase it used to be my favourite. When I ate it, it was definitely delicious, but didn't give that emotional satisfaction that I was expecting (and recalled having in the past). It was kind of hard to make myself eat the whole piece, actually. But then, somehow, five minutes later I was in the kitchen getting another piece. I have no idea why, I just needed more. It was a very strange feeling, and I was left with the familiar post wheat-binge guilt.

Since going paleo I'm rarely besieged by uncontrollable cravings except the odd occasion when a particularly wonderful dessert or the smell of something freshly baked is near. And I definitely haven't felt guilty about eating anything since I stopped eating wheat. In fact, I eat whatever I want (except wheat) and as much as I want, including fat, without ever feeling like I've over eaten (except if I have wheat). Funny, that. I welcome returning to paleo for the feeling of control over my own food intake and the feeling of satisfaction without guilt of overeating.

Also, I really enjoyed the removal of the layer that was covering my abs. Probably they'll go away for a little while. See you soon, abs.


I've taken a reverse before photo and some waist measurements that I will be comparing as we go along so stay tuned. And if you have any glutenous things around the house that you want to get rid of without wasting them, I'll probably take them off your hands ;)

Cocoa Coconut Paleo Peanut Butter Cups

I love Reece Peanut Butter Cups. A lot. They were probably my favourite candy bar, and I admit to occasonally still consuming them in a bowl icecream from Coldstone Creamery. They're just so good, and really, what's a little peanut butter (and extra sugar and dairy), right?

I digress. The point is, I discovered a way to satisfy the PB cup craving (or rather, a lovely lady named Deborah discovered it, and I discovered her recipe, and now I'm sharing it with you!) without completely falling off the paleo wagon. If you want to be strictly paleo, you can use almond butter instead of peanut butter. These delightful treats are just as tasty as the original, in my opinion, and far less sugary. For reference, the original has 12 grams of carbs per cup (11 from sugar) while these have roughly 6.6 grams of carbs (< 2 from honey and the rest from cocoa, nut butter, and coconut butter...all good things!). MMmmmm healthy fats.

Cocoa Coconut Paleo Peanut (or Almond) Butter Cups
Original recipe from Deborah at blueravenwellness.com

WARNING: This is NOT ideal for a summer picnic as the coconut butter will melt. I made them on a fairly warm day and had to keep them in the fridge before serving, and they still melted in people's hands.

SUGAR NOTE: I thought these were delightful as is, but the chocolate comes out tasting like 80-85% dark chocolate, so if you're making these for kids probably I'd add a bit more honey.

EXTRA NOTE: Carrie doesn't like peanut butter and suggested caramel might be just the thing to put in the center instead. I think this is a fine idea!

¼ cup almond butter [or peanut butter if you're a Paleo slacker like I am]

4 teaspoons honey or maple syrup, divided

3 tablespoons coconut oil

½ cup coconut butter or coconut cream [I get this stuff at Goodness Me but it isn't cheap. Deborah has a note on making your own more cheaply on her site but I haven't a proper food processor so I bought mine.]

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

Pinch of sea salt [I used 3-4 grinds of my mill per batch]

6 tablespoons cocoa powder

 

12 mini muffin papers

1 mini muffin tin

 

1. In a small bowl, mix the nut butter with 1 teaspoon honey or maple syrup. 

2. In a small saucepan melt the coconut oil over low heat, then add the coconut butter. Gently warm the coconut butter until it can be stirred into the coconut oil.
3. When coconut butter and coconut oil are well combined, add vanilla, remaining honey or maple syrup and a pinch of sea salt. Stir well.
4. Add cocoa powder. Remove from heat. 

 

5. Line each muffin tin with a mini-muffin paper. While it is still warm, place 1 ½ teaspoons of the coconut chocolate mixture in each paper. With the damp tip of your index finger, spread the chocolate mixture out to the sides of the muffin paper. [My mixture was much more liquidy than this and could be plain old poured]

 

5b. I had to put mine in the fridge at this point for about 20 min to solidify enough that the nut butter wouldn't sink!

 

6. Place a scant teaspoon of the nut butter in the center of each muffin paper. 

 

7. Place teaspoons full of chocolate mixture on top of almond butter. With the damp tip of your index finger, spread chocolate out so it covers the almond butter and connects with the edge of the chocolate bottom. [Again, mine was still warm enough to be poured]

8. Cool at room temperature [if you have very powerful air conditioning, or if it's winter and otherwise put in the fridge to cool until ready to serve].

9. Share with someone so you don't eat them all!

Not so boring Breaded Zucchini

I've been on a bit of a Zucchini kick lately, trying to come up with ways to make the otherwise rather bland vegetable that are more exciting than roasting **note, I considerd calling the post "Zucchini Warriors" as a shoutout to one of my favourite childhood authors, Grodan Korman, but I figured the sample size of those who would get it was small....but just know, I thought about it.

First up in the "zucchini isn't boring" series is courtesy of Nick, who suggested "why don't you bread it in some of your almond stuff." He's so smart. If I'd had parmesan and tomato sauce at the time I likely would have gone even further and made Zucchini Parmesan. But I didn't. Add that to the "pending dinners" list.

"Breaded" Zucchini
These are an excellent way to get some good, filling fats into your meal while excitifying your veggies!

Ingredients

• zucchini
• handful of almond flour
• 1 egg
• salt, pepper, and herbs if you want (I used a bit of oregano)
• olive or coconut oil

1. Slice the zucchini with the slices as even in thickness as possible
2. Heat your pan with olive oil or coconut oil
3. Whisk the egg in a bowl
4. Put the almond flour in another bowl and stir in seasonings
5. Dip the zucchini slices in the egg and then in the flour mixture (both sides)
6. Fry until the almond flour starts to brown and then flip, less than 5 minutes each side I'd say. Watch the almond doesn't burn. The zucchini doesn't take long to cook so you're just getting the batter to your desired toastiness.
7. Serve plain or with tomato sauce (and parmesan if that's your scene)

Option: Try with eggplant? I feel like eggplant is more complicated though and requires some sort of salting process so probably ask the internet before trying that....

Double Baked Chocolate Chip Cookies

I know it may appear as though I've been a total slacker in the writing department, but I promise that just isn't so! I've been spending my evenings interviewing top athletes competing in the CrossFit Games Canada East Regionals and writing up their profiles (in return for actual monies!!). It's supercool to be involved and to have the chance to give some much deserved recognition to amazing athletes like the slo-mo muscleup queen Brit Holmberg. Regionals are in Toronto May 11-13 and I highly recommend checking it out, it's going to be quite a spectacle of incredible strength and stamina including 100 lb dumbell snatches with One Arm. In.Sane. I'll be the one in the MEDIA shirt standing at the finish line with a tub of icecream ;)

To make up for my absence of late, I offer you COOKIES! If you're wondering why there are only two on the plate instead of the 30 that I made, it's because I ate the rest (well, I shared the rest at a potluck, but probably ate more than my share) before realizing with two left that I should probably take a picture and consider ermeging from my blogging hibernation.

Double Baked Chocolate Chip Cookies

These are a modification of Elana's chocolate chip cookies (notice that there were only 3 on the plate in her photo!). I subbed coconut oil for grapeseed oil in her recipe, which gives them a nice coconut flavour (you could do clarified butter instead), and I subbed honey for agave (next time I'm trying coconut sugar, I just forgot it existed this time).

Ingredients

• 2 ½ cups blanched almond flour
• ½ teaspoon celtic sea salt
• ½ teaspoon baking soda
• ½ cup coconut oil (melted)
• 1 tablespoon vanilla extract
• ½ cup honey (I use raw! But not as much as called for, roughly 1/3 cup)
• 1 cup chocolate chips (I used half enjoy life chocolate chips, and half chopped up dark chocolate bar)
  

1. Combine dry ingredients in a large bowl
2. Stir together wet ingredients in a smaller bowl
3. Mix wet ingredients into dry
4. Form 1-inch balls and press onto a parchment paperlined baking sheet
5. Bake at 350° for 7-10 minutes
6. Cool and serve

ATTENTION: YOU ARE NOT DONE!

7. This is the most important part and turns the normal sogginess of almond flour cookies into proper cookie crispiness. Once the cookies are mostly cooled, stick them back in the oven for another 3 minutes or so. Watch them closely so they don't burn, and take them out when they start to get dark edges like in the picture. You may have a row of cookies that are already browned (if your oven is like mine, it'll be the back row). Leave these ones out.

If you're skeptical about the last part, consider the difference between toasted nuts and non-toasted. Exactly.

Learning to love your leafy greens

Chicken thighs with kale

Holy crap I love kale. But before I get to the leafy greens...

I went to a stats course this week for work, and lunch was provided. I made the mistake of checking "gluten free" as a dietary restriction when I registered, and was presented with a platter of "sanwiches" made with gluten free bread. It. Is. Terrible. It has the taste and texture of styrofoam, the stuff doesn't even bend. If you've been scared away from trying to make your own paleo bread because of a traumatic experience with this sort of stuff, I urge you to give it a try. The recipes from Elana's Pantry are much, much better.

As if that wasn't bad enough, the gluten free sandwiches were also vegetarian. Us paleo folk ended up ravaging the regular sandwiches and gutting them for their protein-filled innards. Next time, I'm going to click "other" and ask them to bring me a plate of meat.

So I haven't posted in a while, because I've been occupied writing profiles for the CrossFit Games mainsite! It is MUCH harder to write about someone else and try to accurately convey their thoughts; I'm used to writing about myself, and spewing my stream of concoiusness, uncensored. But it's been a neat experience so far,  I've had the chance to talk to some pretty neat-o crossfitters. I'll probably post some sort of sum up of the Games Open at some point when I'm feeling more profound.

Pecan and coconut crusted tilapia with chard and bacon

In the meantime, all this nice weather and growing green stuff has reminded me that I've yet to share my trials and errors with the fickle task of making leafy greens taste good. And so, I present to you....

Greens. I used to hate them with a burning passion (except lettuce, which I now think is a bit of a snore. Except arugula...arugula is a badass lettuce). But now, I eat some sort of leafy green probably twice/week, and since I've sort of figured out the preparation process, I actually enjoy them! So this is a compliation of my process with various tips and options based on the green of choice.

I will preface with a link of why leafy greens are worth learning to love

Oh So Good Leafy Greens
It took me 2 or 3 tries with each kind of green to make them actually tasty and not just edible.  Probably you'll just have to give it a try yourself, and probably it will be too squishy or too tough or otherwise not quite right the first time, but here's a place to start. If you don't love them right away, don't give up. I had to force myself through several iterations of greens at first, but now I actually look forward to them!

1. Pick a green! Kale is my most favouritest. I also often make collard greens and sometimes chard. Chard is more bitter than the rest, and requires bacon to help with that (Nick's mom's idea!).
2. Heat up your pan with olive and/or coconut oil (for kale or collards). Chard option: chop up a package of bacon and fry up the pieces until crispy. Set aside the bacon and leave enough fat for your chard.
3. Meanwhile, tear the leaves from the stems (kale or collard) or chop up the whole thing (chard) into a strainer and rinse. Don't shake off too much water, the water will help steam the greens.
4. Dump the greens into the pan. It will seem like they won't fit, just pile them in anyway.
5. Stir (or really it's more of a toss) the leaves to coat with oil. When they've cooked down enough that you can fit the lid on the pan, put the lid on. Let steam for 2 or 3 minutes.
6. Add stuff. For kale and collards I add raisins and sesame seeds, and a little bit of sesame oil. I also sometimes put a bit of salt and garlic powder, depending on my mood and the saltiness/garlicness of the rest of my meal. For chard I put the bacon back in (I leave some of the bacon out for breakfasts the rest of the week!), and add garlic powder.
7. Assess your greens. They will turn bright green as they start to cook, then get darker. After I've added stuff, I check how squishy they look. If they look a bit too squishy (too much water) I leave the lid off, and if they look a bit dry I leave it on to keep in the moisture. Cook some more.
8. Taste for doneness as you go along, stirring regularly. Kale and collards will take 10-15 minutes for the whole process. Chard takes longer.

Sausage and roasted sweet potato chips with collard greens

Tips
1. All greens are better fresh. If you leave them in the fridge for too long before cooking they will end up chewy.
2. Don't try to eat the stems of kale. The stems of chard are good though and get a bit mushy like rhubarb.
3. Sometimes I let the kale overcook and it ends up kind of crispy like kale chips.
4. The raisins really balance the flavour, I think, and steaming them with the greens makes them all plump. You can also add pinenuts or almond slivers, among other things (as a garnish, so they don't get soggy).
(5. Sometimes, when feeling indulgent, I fry some diced potatoes to add back in with the chard and bacon. But don't tell the person who write's this blog, as it would be a bit contradictory, given the title)